I was at dinner recently with a friend and colleague of mine, the I Do Decorator, we discussed some memories and weddings we have worked on. From that conversation, I have come up with this list of suggestions and Do’s and Don’ts for brides planning their special day.
- Do keep in mind that you are not the only person getting married. I are working with many other brides and your wedding, happiness and memories are VERY important to me, but I am probably working with at least fifty or more other brides.
- Don’t theme your wedding. This is NOT a birthday party or college kegger. This is your wedding. If after talking with friends and family who will be honest with you please read “Five Alarm Fire.”
- Do think seriously about waiting at least six months (or more) after your groom is out of jail before getting married. I believe you. I’m sure he’s innocent and that “the man” has the wrong guy, but just think about it, ok?
- Do remember your bridesmaids will probably never wear that dress again; especially if it involves tulle, taffeta, lace and any color besides black, brown or gray. Each one of these fabulous women will buy whatever dress you choose because they love you, but don’t show them the picture of the mermaid cut, form fitting, hot pink dress with aqua blue tulle spitting out of the bottom and say “I chose this because I thought you could wear it again sometime.” Did you really?
- Don’t be “that bride” and get so intoxicated that you can’t remember your wedding. If you decide to drink in your wedding dress, try to stick with something clear like vodka and Sprite. Red wine, cherry pucker, and cranberry juice are never friends with someone wearing all white.
- Do think long term about the colors you choose for your wedding. Baby shower pink is not a good color on you, your bridesmaids, decorations or anything….unless it is a baby shower. You will have these pictures and memories FOREVER – do you really want an all light pink reception?
- Do be a kind and supportive Mother of the Bride, I know you are paying for everything, but really, this is your daughter’s special day. Let her make some decisions and try not to call me as soon as she is out of the room to change things to how you want them.
- Do remember that limits are good. Limit the number of bridal showers you have. Limit the distance the showers are in respect to the attendees. Limit the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen. You don’t need to have every friend you know buy the dress, shoes, tux, etc. Four bridesmaids are good, but 12 are too many.
- Don’t let your meetings with vendors, decorators, wedding planners, etc last more than an hour. I know you have a lot to do, and so do I so like a professor of mine always said – K.I.S.S (Keep It Simple Stupid).
- Don’t ask me to do the impossible. Although I am here to make your event run smooth and help you have an unforgettable night, I cannot repaint the walls of your chosen venue, regardless of how much you insist beige doesn’t flow well with your color scheme. I will also not lay carpet or hire someone to install carpet on the marble floors no matter how much you think your feet will be cold when dancing barefoot, bring slippers.
- Don’t go barefoot. Do you know how many other people and things have walked on these floors? Toss a pair of slippers or something into your bridal bag. Barefoot all night may equal black feet and possibly the development of some type of foot fungus.
- Don’t register at too many places. Yes, options for your gift givers are always good, but your list of registries should not be longer than a legal size sheet of paper.
- Don’t take out a second, third or fourth mortgage on your home (or your parent’s home) to pay for your wedding reception.
- Do invite only immediate family when you are getting married for the third, fourth or fifth time. I mean, how many toasters and blenders do you really need?
- Don’t get married on a day where the numbers line up to be consecutive or matching (i.e. 07/08/09 or 09/09/09) for luck. There is nothing that proves this to be “lucky.” Any other day of the year is just as “lucky.” Marriage is not about luck, but about love, patience, compromise, hard work and faith.
- Don’t take it out on me. I am here for support and to help you, but I am not your verbal punching bag.
- Do only invite the people you want to share your special day with. If you think that your Maid of Honor’s third cousin is weird – don’t invite him! Your wedding day is about surrounding yourself with people who love, support and celebrate you and your groom, not inviting as many people as possible.
- Do remember that your first kiss as husband and wife does not need to involve tongue. Remember your dad is in the front row with your grandma!
- Don’t include “cash gifts only” anywhere on your wedding invitation. This may be considered by all of your guests to be rude and if it were me giving you a “cash only gift” I would give you a penny.
- Don’t forget about the feelings of your loved ones. Yes this day is about celebrating you and your chosen spouse, but there are a lot of people who love you helping you throughout the process, don’t forget that a special thank you and kind words are appreciated.
Take to heart this advice. You will want to be remembered as a kind, loving and fun bride, not the kind of bride that has stories and blogs written about her!
The “I Do” Expert